Hold space and step into YOUR best way of being

13346508_10153893325041645_3478602027368466649_nLet’s practise a little unconditional love today!

When I first read the pictured quote from Goethe, I got caught up in the “ought to be” part… My mind started to wonder if this was being judgmental. Who decides what “ought to be” for someone else?

Unless we ask someone what they ought to be, then our behaviour is based on our subjective belief of what another is capable of being or “should” be.

Or is it? Is that always true?

We can see, feel and hear when a person is not acting from their own highest good. We can see, feel and hear when someone is fully immersed in negativity, anger, fear, self-loathing, victimization, pain or blaming.

When someone experiencing the world from that dark place, they are disconnected from their Wise Inner Self. They are acting from the part of the brain that manages the fight-or-flight response, from fear, from a sense of impending danger or loss.  In “coach-speak”, they are not fully accessing the inner resources available to them.

We can recognize that they are in that dark place without judging them, and can simply acknowledge it rather than reacting to it.

I began to see that this quote isn’t just about the other person and who they ought (or ought not) to be… It’s fundamentally about our Self and how we choose to react — or respond — to someone else’s behaviour, and whether or not we can hold space for someone to step into their best way of being…. by stepping into our best way of being.

And how do we do that? By:

💞 choosing to not react to their negative state with one of our own — judgment, criticism, anger — but, instead, choosing to respond to the highest and best part of them with the highest and best part of us.

💞 responding with thoughtfulness rather than reacting in a knee-jerk tit-for-tat way…

💞 trusting and respecting their journey…

💞 supporting them without enabling them… allowing them to own their own solutions

💞 holding space for them, and for our Self. When we hold space, it means just that: with our love and acceptance we hold a container of safe space for another to fully experience their own journey, their own processes, and come to their own decisions and actions.

💞 being the Isumataq — the person who creates the atmosphere in which wisdom reveals itself.

“Treat people as if they were what they ought to be and you help them to become what they are capable of being.”
– Goethe


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Tip of the day: Use a different perspective to find new choices


During sessions with clients, I often hear the words “I just can’t think of another way to….” or “there are no other choices available“.

And that’s okay — because wherever you are in your journey IS okay. But if you are interested in making changes and opening up to new choices, there are many avenues to explore. Part of my work is helping people open up to other choices and possibilities, and to eliminate those self-limiting beliefs or behaviours that result in fewer choices and replace them with more empowering beliefs and choices.

Know this: There is ALWAYS another choice … because there is always another way to look at a situation or challenge. We can get stuck in that rut of our own beliefs…  we assume they are truths and allowing them to limit our choices.

Find other ways to open up your creative mind.

Look at things in a different way, from a different perspective.

Think outside the box that you created by challenging your assumptions and beliefs.

As John Mason said,

“You can never see the sunrise by looking to the west.”

What do YOU do when you feel blocked? When you cannot see a way forward? If you’ve always “looked to the West”, what might happen if you looked in a different direction?

I use many different tools to help people open up to other choices — including traditional solution-focused coaching tools — such as PSYCH-K®, PER-K® and elements from healing, energy and shamanic work.

For instance, for someone who is stuck in their head or in analysis / paralysis, I might ask them to connect with a chakra such as the heart, root, third eye or solar plexus and then ask them to look at the situation through that way of being. I would ask questions such as:

“What does your heart (third eye, etc) say?”
“What does your heart (root chakra, etc) know that your conscious mind doesn’t know?”

I frequently use oracle or tarot cards, OH cards or runes to stimulate the creative thinking and shift in perspective, asking what insight might be gained from considering the situation from the images presented in the cards.

One of my clients was struggling with her new online business. It was actually doing very well financially but she didn’t feel as happy or satisfied as she thought she would. Something was missing but she couldn’t clearly identify what it was and couldn’t think of how she might resolve her concern that “something was missing”.  She had hoped a shamanic journey might illuminate the answer.

Before we started the journey, I randomly selected two WomanRunes cards asking only for insight that might support her. What came up was The Tree (the Rune of Prosperity) and The Sisters (the Rune of Friendship). Her face lit up immediately… the significance was clear to her and to me. She recognised that what was missing in her business was the energy of personal contact and interaction with her clients, the creative boost she got when working in partnership, with working and creating in a team environment.

We started the journey with that new insight, and afterwards the client started manifesting and exploring possibilities with mind maps and vision boards until a whole new vision was created for her business that broadened her business base to include live sessions, workshops and teaming with other practitioners on select projects.

Experiment with the tools are the most effective for you, that resonate with you, and when you’re stuck again, you will have a whole new tool box with which to work.


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Take one small step… for your Self


Take a risk… Take a chance… Live fiercely! Live authentically!

Some of us are hesitant to be our true Selves because of fear… Fear of ridicule, of hatred, of disapproval, of not fitting in, of being disliked, of being discriminated against…. or even of the opposite – being praised, lauded, or recognized.

This post is not meant to minimize the very real risks of being oneself in cultures and countries where being one’s true Self could have very real and serious implications.

But it is calling to those who have created a very safe and tiny comfort zone of existence in their lives. Start to stretch. Lean in to it. Take a deep breath and then take small steps or actions that reveal your wishes and desires…  try something new… get more comfortable taking a risk… recognize that you CAN feel safe revealing your inner thoughts and Self… that you CAN celebrate how special and unique you are.


Take ONE small step today to start living more authentically, to start following your dream… and journal your experience. 

Take another small step tomorrow… What do you notice? Is it getting easier? Is it at all possible that the reward outweighs the risk? You won’t know until you try. 

✨✨✨Start shining Starchild✨✨✨

“Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dream.”
~ Paulo Coelho

Preparing for a Shamanic Journey: Create Intent


There are many elements to consider before you start your journey but I normally recommend starting with a clear intention.

TIP OF THE DAY: Take some time to craft questions for your Guides that will more clearly elicit the answers you seek.

As always when working with Spirit or your Guides, questions must be clear and specific and — unlike questions you might use when working with a pendulum — can go beyond a simple yes/no response, inviting responses that bring illumination to your journey. How you ask the question can frame – or limit – the reply.

For instance, you might want some insights on a pending decision, such as: “Should I continue in my relationship with Chris?”

Rather than ask that question, which would elicit a simple yes or no response (but not reveal what lessons Spirit sees for you as a result of your choice), consider asking a question such as:

🌀 “Please show me what my life would be like if I continue my relationship with Chris.”

🌀 “What am I overlooking in my decision regarding my relationship with Chris?”

If you are looking for general guidance, your question or intent could be as simple as:

🌀 “I am open to all guidance and information that is in my highest good that will help me create a life in alignment with my  values and with Mother Earth.”

And know that if the response from your Guides is not clear to you, you can always ask for more information or for clarificationp from your Guides whilst on the journey.

Allow what comes, and be open to guidance or even new direction.

Tip of the Day: Be a tree

TIP OF THE DAY: 🌳 Be a tree 🌳 with this Oak Tree grounding and centering meditation.

imageUse this meditative exercise to relax, connect with Mother Earth’s grounding energy and nourish your chakras.

Many cultures consider the Oak to be a sacred tree (the Druids included it in their sacred three along with Ash and Thorn) and it is strongly associated with strength, good fortune and — in spellcraft — with protection and healing.

If Oak doesn’t resonate with you, or is not indigenous to your environment, choose a tree that is strong and sturdy for this exercise.

If possible, do this outdoors in Nature to strengthen that Earth connection even more. But doing this indoors is perfectly acceptable too.

🌳 Relax and breathe deeply. Uncross your arms and legs.

🌳 Imagine your body as the trunk of a magnificent Oak, your arms as its branches, your feet as its roots.

🌳 Feel your roots connect with the Earth’s core energy, deep in the soil, down to the centre of the Earth

🌳 Imagine that Earth energy as a golden elixir, travelling up through your roots in the Earth and connecting to your body, nourishing your chakras from root to crown, and through the branches and leaves of your arms and legs until every cell in your body has absorbed the elixir.

🌳 Continue  to breathe deeply, connecting to the Earth’s energy, strengthening and revitalizing your energy centres.

🌳 Give gratitude to Mother Earth for the life she gives us, and leave an offering for her.


Your first love – the Self❤️


Cherish and honour those you ❤️love❤️ on Valentine’s Day.

But be sure to celebrate YOU — it’s a lifelong relationship that isn’t going away❤️

“To love onself is the start of a life-long romance.”

~ Oscar Wilde

On Valentine’s Day…. Celebrate YOU!

❤️ Love your Self

❤️ Forgive your Self

❤️ Honour your Self

Surround yourself with love, Starchild 

One of the best ways to stay whole and positive, to bloom, to be the wonderful and self-realized individuals that we are, is to surround ourselves with people who believe in us, people who love us.

I am inspired today by this empowering quote from Noor Shirazie:

“You are made out of comets and stars. Do not surround yourself with those who treat you like dirt and dust.”

Sweep those people out of your life, ✨Starchild✨!